Shepard VS the Mako
by KaleA24
Summary: For those of us who have a love hate relationship with the Mako


The Girls:

"WATCH OUT FOR THE BOULDER!"

"I can see it, Liara," Shepard replies in a voice that manages to convey her amusement, nonchalance and annoyance all at the same time. She knew this would happen and that is why she brought "her girls."

"Shepard, I don't think that the Mako is capable of traveling straight up this cliff. Maybe we should be trying to finding a more gradual incline," says Tali trying desperately not to let the sheer terror come through in her tone. The look on Shepard's face says that she is going to make this vehicle go straight up the side of this cliff to show it just how Commander Shepard deals with obstacles. It is not the kind of look that you want to be on the face of the person operating a Mako. Tali glances back at Ashley in a silent plea that maybe she can get Shepard to see reason. Ashley looks back at her with a look that says she will try but she's pretty sure it won't work.

"Shepard, we are at the top and I think I can see those monkey things that stole the disc. I think I can see a way down too."

"So do I," replies Shepard as she nears the edge of the cliff at an angle luring her passengers into a false sense of security as she attempts to tip the Mako over the edge.

"GODDESS….!"

"KEELAH…!"

"HOLY SHIIIIIIII…..!"

Three voices cry out at the same moment in panic while Shepard's face splits into a wide grin because for a split second she thinks that she as finally managed to accomplish her goal after countless failed attempts. But at the last second the Mako's stabilizers kick in and the Mako rolls down the side of the cliff gathering enough speed to be a rush but not flipping it like she had wanted it to. She sighs in disappointment as the Mako comes to rest on the ground. She starts to drive forward but decides that she is not done trying yet and is about to turn around to go for another round when her passengers finally regain their composers. Ashley is the first to realize what Shepard is about to do. She lunges towards the front seat screaming, "Like hell! We are not doing that again! I'm driving!" Shepard allows herself to be dragged out of the driver's seat and she and Ashley have just settled into their seats when Liara screams, "WATCH OUT!" Ashley grabs the wheel and jerks it to the side faster than the Mako's systems can react and Shepard screams in shear joy as she feels the Mako FINALLY beginning to tip over on its side and roll over twice before coming to rest on its roof. She managers to pull herself together long enough tomake sure everyone else is alright. Liara is helping Tali to her feet, Tali's suit doesn't have any punctures and her face plate is intact. Liara and Ashley have small cuts on their faces and she is sure she has some as well and they will all have some bruising but she is so excited that she was finally able to get the Mako to roll that all she can do is grin.

"What were you trying to avoid any way?" She asks.

"That," Ashley replies dryly. Shepard looks out of the Mako's windshield and bursts into laughter again and she sees a monkey/opossum looking creature staring blankly back at her.

The Boys:

Once again Shepard is driving the Mako straight towards the first mountain to try to flip the Mako again only this time she has a very supportive and enthusiastic audience. Well that is except for Kaiden who I sitting in the back being very quiet. She is sure that he is quoting all of the rules that they are breaking in his head. She is not fooled by his silence tho. She saw the gleam of his inner 5 year old when she finally told them her plan.

"I thought that this approach didn't work last time," observed Garrus. "At least now we know why they looked like they tried to take on a Thresher Maw in hand to hand combat." Neither he nor Wrex could figure out why the "girls" didn't have fun the last time Shepard took them out in the Mako. They had come back from that mission with it not only incomplete but with the girls looking harried and refusing to speak to anyone. That was weeks ago and they hadn't been able to get anyone to tell them the story until Shepard told them, when they had landed on the same planet to finish the mission, that she had been trying to flip the Mako. Instead of being appalled by her childishness they had been trying to help her figure out the best way to get the Mako to flip more than once.

"I thought that if we could repeat the same actions that caused the fail safes to not be able to react at a greater height then we would get more revolutions," said Shepard in an overly serious tone. She looked over at a dumbfounded Garrus and stared to laugh. "I wanted to fly down the cliff again, alright," she admitted.

They tried time and time again but even though they had the best ride flying down the cliff they still couldn't react quick enough to get it to flip. By the third trip down the cliff all of the members of this Mako ride were laughing and screaming in delight. Even Kaiden threw his hands in the air like he was on an actual ride. By the tenth time they decided that it would be their last trip down the cliff and then they would finish what they actually came here to do. When they were almost to the bottom Kaiden, who was afraid that the temptation for "one more go" would be too much for Shepard, insisted on driving. Shepard moved aside and sat in the passenger seat while Kaiden took her spot. The Mako was rolling along at a considerable speed thanks to the near straight drop from the last run. Kaiden settled in the seat and right as he grabbed the wheel Wrex said as calmly as only a Krogan would in this situation, "You might not want to hit that."

Kaiden jerked the wheel to the side and with the speed and the fact that he was just a tad bit quicker than Ashley, the Mako managed to roll 3 times before it came to rest upside down.

"What did we almost hit this time?" Asks Shepard as she rolls her sore neck.

"Well there wasn't actually anything there when I said it," Wrex confesses, "but now there is." And they all burst into hysterical laughter when they see what could possibly be the same opossum-monkey that was staring at the Mako the first time these crazy beings managed disturb his/her peace.

"Well that's twice that it's been the threat of a monkey creature that makes the Mako flip," Garrus says with an air of analyzing a very serious problem to find the illusive answer. "It's official. The Mako is terrified of those things."

They couldn't stop laughing as they got out of the Mako to push it right side up and call for a pick up. This mission would have to wait a bit, again.


End file.
